"As I’m sitting in 929 waiting for my tea to seep deep into the millennial-cherished oat milk, my mind should be focused on completing an overwhelming amount of statistics homework instead of seeping into a pool of millennial-accepted anxiety. I let my foot shake haphazardly as I desperately try to find ways to fill any and all free time with productive advancement. The mere thought of having periods of openness within my week sends fear down my spine. This fear, which is unconstitutionally sound, is controlling, mentally catastrophic, and, if dwelled upon long enough, defining. Instead of falling to my knees and surrendering all anxiety to God, I rise to my feet and run. Sometimes this is a physical act, and sometimes it is metaphorical; like when I run to Instagram or a new Netflix show to distract myself rather than confronting my emotions. Within this act of distraction, I am filled with a sense of immediate avoidance, but an hour later, I am back to shaking my leg as I absent-mindedly stare at my calendar believing that if it could be full, I would be filled.
But, besides a trashcan or English class binder, paper can never fill. It can never fill the God-sized hole created by sin that allows me to long for intimacy with my Creator. It can never fully take away the fear of loneliness or cover the lies of Satan. Even when I do have a full schedule, I am constantly reminded of my need for a Savior. God allows small hiccups in my daily planner to remind me that He is the ultimate authority, and that if I surrender my time to Him, I can be abundantly filled, and my cup of tea, with oat milk of course, will never run out.
Even as I am writing these words, I am thinking of all the things I have to do. However, God continues to point out that time spent with Him is worthy of the ultimate reward. It brings lasting satisfaction and fulfillment that far outweighs anything I could possibly imagine. So, here is to the next glass of tea and time spent with my Savior as I keep my calendar zipped up inside my backpack, blank statistics papers hiding it from view." -Anonymous
Comments